Lila's Crazy Journey
by The Princess of Nightmares
Summary: Join Professor Birch's niece Lila as she goes on a fantastical and generally effed up journey through Unova with her best friend and cousin! With her insane pokemon from Hoenn, nothing is too weird for these 14-year-olds!
1. Prolouge

I sat there, head pressed against a wall. We reached forward to touch hands just once more before it was all over. A mere two inches separated us. Tears streamed down my face and into my horrible cuts, as I screamed out in pain. I clawed at the bricks above my head and forced my weak body to stand up and try to break the infernal chains, but with no such luck. We both couldn't break the chains; we could only scream. The tiny shred of hope I had was slipping away far too quickly.

Hang on; you're probably really confused, right?

I should start at the beginning.

Hi, I'm Lila: pokemon trainer. I live in the Hoenn region with my best friend, Nick and my cousin Ruby. See, I'm Professor Birch's niece. I love Hoenn, but I need something different. That's why I'm going on a journey with Nick and Ruby through Unova!

So, now that you know that, I'll start talking about how epic it was.


	2. Lighning Sucks!

"Lila!" The sharp voice of my silver-haired cousin woke me from a dreamless sleep.

"What?" I complained. "I was asleep!"

"I know! We're landing soon! You can see the Unova region!" My best friend Nick supplied cheerily. I glanced out the window of the airplane and below us lay the vast Unova region. "Wow," I muttered to myself.

It was truly beautiful. You could see all the forests, huge cities, lakes, rivers, and oceans together as a moving map. "This is going to be AWESOME!" I half screamed, a bit too happy for the usual me.

"I want to catch a legendary pokemon!" Ruby yelled.

"I want to catch every kind of Dark pokemon there is!" Nick yelled, even louder.

"I want to become the champion and get a bunch of new friends!" I yelled loudest of the three of us. As we buzzed happily about what would happen, the plane descended into the new region. We all heard the doors open, and scrambled out of the seats. I already had my bag with me, so I was the first to run outside.

I took a deep breath of the new air. It smelled like rain with a touch of jet fuel. I threw out all of my pokemon, including Blossom, Minus, Plus, and Lantern, and they all stood frozen, staring at the growing storm cloud. I knelt down next to my shorter pokemon, and said, "It's alright. I know you guys hate storms, but we'll be out of it in a second." I tried to pick up Minus, but she just used discharge on me. I was a bit fried, so I let her down.

Finally, Nick and Ruby caught up to me, trailing their pokemon. They were panting and clearly exhausted from running. Suddenly, Ruby's Mightyena (nicknamed Killer) howled at the huge storm cloud. We all jumped and covered our ears from the horrific noise. "Killer! What has gotten into you?" He yelled urgently. There was a flash of light, and I saw that Lantern had let out a humongous thunderbolt at the storm. Then Minus and Plus used discharge, Blossom used shadow ball after shadow ball at the massive storm, and Absol (I couldn't come up with a nickname for him) used psycho cut!

"I've had enough!" Nick yelled. "Go, Sableye! Use shadow claw to snap them out of it!" He called. The pokemon with diamond eyes grew shadow claws, and prepared to attack our pokemon. Then, a rapid lightning bolt hit all of our pokemon, which turned the Shadow Claw into Lightning Claw! I quickly returned everyone to their pokeballs, and so did Ruby. The sableye was heading right for me, a hungry look in its diamond eyes. "Wait, STOP!" Nick yelled. But it was too late. I was scratched AND electrocuted.

There was a scent of burning, and I realized it was my flesh. I blinked.

"Oh god, Lila, I'm so sorry!" Nick said as he ran up to me. "Are you all right? Does it hurt anywhere? Do you need any help?" It was like this for about five minutes until I finally yelled, "_**GOD, I'M FINE, NICK! I've been electrocuted before!**_" He was clearly stunned my crazy outburst. Nick flushed, and returned Sableye to its pokeball.

"Well, come on!" I called, running off. "Let's go before it happens again!"


	3. New Trainers!

Running ahead, I saw Professor Birch and Ms. Mancerdra approaching us.

"Nick!" His mom yelled.

"Everything's alright, Ms. Mancerdra. Just a bit of lightning, nothing too troublesome." I responded. Everyone was used to being splashed by Lantern, and then getting zapped. That was his kind of joke.

"Oh, Professor Birch! I'm sorry I'm so late!" someone said behind us. We all turned around and laid eyes on a young woman. She was maybe in her early 20's, with auburn hair pulled into a disheveled bun on her head, and light blue eyes like the sky. She was also wearing a lab coat.

Uncle Birch introduced us. "Lila, Ruby, Nick, this is Professor Juniper."

Professor Juniper smiled at us warmly. "Hi there! I've heard a lot about you three!"

"Hey," I responded casually. Ruby went totally crazy, shook her hand and totally babbled on about his goals in life. Nick punched him in the arm to shut him up.

(-)

So, after everything was resolved, we were put in a jeep and driven to Nuvema town. I had sent out Minus and Plus to sit on my shoulders because my real partner was Blossom, but she's too big to sit on my shoulder or something.

Anyway, Minus and Plus looked around, seeing all the new pokemon and scenery. Nick, Ruby, and I were jam packed into the backseat, with me having to sit in the middle. I glanced at Minus and Plus and laughed at their adorable curiosity.

"You know, Minun and Plusle aren't common here." Uncle Birch said from the front seat.

"Really? Is Killer rare?" ruby asked.

My uncle laughed. "Yes, Killer is rare here, too."

"I've never seen a Plusle or Minun here. What is Killer?" Professor Juniper asked.

"He's a mightyena!" Ruby said proudly.

I lifted the twin electric-types off my shoulders and hugged them. "You're special here, guys!" I said lovingly to them.

"And you three should see some amazing new pokemon at the lab, as well!" Uncle Birch continued.

Nick was star-struck. "Will there be dark types?" He asked.

"Maybe," My uncle responded.

I was star-struck, too. There was a whole new world of pokemon to befriend, new people to battle, and so many possibilities for adventure!

Minus and Plus were running around on our laps. Minus stopped on Ruby's, and used discharge. The same happened with Plus, but with Nick!

"Are they okay? They've been doing that a lot." Uncle Birch commented.

Professor Juniper turned to us. "I'll run some tests on them, just to make sure they're alright."

I nodded.

(-)

When we got to the lab, some assistants hooked up suction cups to my little electrical sockets. They were on their ears, cheeks, and a few on their bodies.

"Just hold still for a little while longer, Minus and Plus," She instructed. "It's only for a few minutes."

"So, how are they, Professor?" I asked.

She took her eyes off the large screen. "As far as I can tell, there aren't any issues with them."

Minus and Plus smiled, and jumped up and down. They were about to spring up onto my shoulders when Professor Juniper stopped them. "Hold on; I just want to be certain." The cute electricity twins got really sad and about ten thousand times more adorable.

I finally noticed that there was another girl in here. She had light skin, deep blue eyes, and a huge brown ponytail with two pieces of hair in front of her shoulders. She wore a plain white t-shirt with a black vest, ripped short shorts, and boots with pink laces. She also had a pink hat with a pokeball logo on it. "Professor Juniper! We are for our pokemon!" She yelled very enthusiastically.

The professor looked at her watch. "Oh, Miranda! I forgot that you and your friends were coming today!"

Alex stuck a fist in the air. "I can wait! I'll just grab another coffee!"

Professor Juniper dismissed it. "It's completely fine!" She turned to face us. "Everyone, this is Alex. I'm giving her and two other boys their first pokemon, but…I seem to have forgotten." She introduced us, a tad embarrassed.

(-)

The other two boys walked in. One had shaggy blond hair, an orange jacket, khaki pants, tennis shoes, and a green camera which he was using to take pictures of the machinery. The second one had long-ish brown hair, a blue jacket, black pants, orange tennis shoes, and a hat with the pokeball logo on it. He was standing against a wall sulking.

"Trip! Brandon! Nice to see you!" The Professor said from halfway across the room. Nick and Ruby pushed the cart in, and Alex and I followed Professor Juniper. She introduced us. Sulker was Brandon, and Photographer was Trip.

"Hey," I responded again, as it is my usual greeting. Could be a bad guy, the president, or someone super important; it's always, "Hey."

Ruby rushed up to them. "Hi, I'm Ruby! I'm going on a journey here with my cousin and her friend who she swears is just a friend but I know they're dating. We're pretty good! I placed third in the Pokemon League. You're starting your journey, right? My dad gave me my pokemon before Lila! She was so jealous. So are you excited? I bet you could even fall asleep! I know I couldn't. Not just because we're going somewhere new, but Lila was asleep on the wall and talking like an insane person! She's so-"

I placed my hand over his mouth. "Sorry about my cousin. He's had ten javas this morning." Ruby licked my hand. "Dude! Not cool!" I pulled my hand away from his face and punched him in the arm pretty hard.

Trip looked at us like we were insane. "Where are you even _from_?" He asked.

"Littleroot Town, Hoenn," Nick informed.

Trip smirked. "Oh. That explains it."

"Explains what?" I asked, crossing my arms.

He chuckled. "You said you were pretty strong, but that's just compared to the trainers in the boonies."

I flushed out of anger. Blond little bastard…I was thinking of saying that to his face.

Nick put a fist next to his face. "What did you say, shrimp? 'From the boonies'? You want to repeat that to my FACE?" He threatened. Trip smirked again. Wow, he has willpower. Nick gets super mad when guys flirt with me or I'm insulted (which kind of means he's insulted)

The professor pulled them apart. "Hey, don't fight! This is a happy day!" She said to the fighting fourteen-year-olds.

Brandon stepped up, part of his face hidden from his hat. "Could we just see the pokemon?" He asked darkly.

"Oh, yes, of course!" She picked up the first pokeball and tossed it in the air. "Here's Snivy, a grass type!" Out popped a green snake walking on two legs, looking smug.

She picked up the second one. "Then there's Tepig, a fire type!" The ball flew in the air, and a black and orange pig came out.

"And finally," the professor said as she picked up the third pokeball. "Oshawott, the water type!" Out came a sea otter, with huge brown eyes and a big smile. I couldn't resist myself; I picked him up and cuddled him

"You're just the cutest thing!" I said, oddly out of character. Jack and Trip looked like they were going to throw up or pass out or both. Finally, I put him down and blushed.

"So, now you can choose which one you want!"

Alex ran up to Oshawott. "I pick you! You're so cute!"

"Great, I wanted Tepig." Brandon said with no emotion.

"I wanted Snivy anyway." Trip muttered.

Professor Juniper smiled, and handed them the pokeball, and pokedexes. "Take good care of these guys, okay?"

Alex threw her hands in the air. "I will!"

Brandon rolled his eyes, while Trip took pictures of each of the three starters.

Then they walked out of the lab.


	4. The Battle with Trip!

I decided to follow them, since I had nothing else to do. I started talking to Trip. "So, you going to travel and get the 8 badges?" I asked.

"Yeah, so?"

"Just asking, god." I replied in an equally snobbish tone.

Then, Minus and Plus ran out and jumped into my arms!

"Minus! Plus!" I exclaimed. "How are my electric sweeties?" Trip was stunned and staring at me and my pokemon. "What, I can't hug my pokemon?"

He still seemed shocked. "Are those, Plusle and Minun?"

"Yeah, so?" I replied, mocking him a bit. He snapped a photo of me and them. "Okay…random."

He came closer to me. "Look, a minun and plusle together in Unova? That's HUGE."

I shrugged and glanced upwards. "Well, I have other pokemon."

He was in awe. "'Other pokemon'?" He said slowly.

"Yeah. Ruby told you, we're pretty good."

He looked slightly impressed. "Want to have a battle?"

"What?"

"One-on-one match. You, me, a battle."

I thought for a minute. Maybe it would be good to teach the Blond Bastard some manners. "Fine."

(-)

I knew what pokemon to use. After all, I wasn't cocky, so I didn't choose Lantern. Trip sent out Snivy, and I sent out Blossom.

Trip scanned her using his pokedex. "Gardevoir, the embrace pokemon. Gardevoir can create small black holes and will give its life to save a trainer it has closely bonded with." The dex read. He pulled out the camera and took pictures of them.

"Alright, you get first move." I declared.

"Fine. Snivy, tackle."

"Sny!" The little grass snake ran up to Blossom.

"Blossom, psychic!" Her eyes glowed, and she lifted it up into the air. Suddenly, it was cut short. "Alright, try shadow ball!" I was expecting dark energy to form a sphere around her hands, but absolutely nothing happened!

"Show her Vine Whip, Snivy." Thick green vines came out of Snivy's shoulders, and slapped her in the face.

"Gar, garde _voir_!" she yelled, which probably meant, "Bitch, it is _on_!" Snivy took a step back and momentarily lost its smugness. However, it quickly regained itself.

"That's right! Use Charge Beam!" I yelled. And yet, NOTHING STILL! "Ice punch! Something! Do anything!" I yelled, a bit frazzled. But nothing was working.

"Finish it with Leaf Tornado." Snivy spun in a circle, enclosing itself in a leaf tornado. It threw the weird thing onto Blossom. She fell over, and Trip won.

"What the hell?" I screamed.

That's when I knew something was very, _very_ wrong.

First, I had lost to a beginner trainer. Second, Blossom couldn't use her strongest attacks.


	5. Starting My Actual Journey!

I scooped up my beautiful partner and rushed her inside. "Uncle Birch! Professor Juniper! Something terrible has happened!"

The professor poked her head up from behind a counter. "What?"

"I was battling trip, and Blossom couldn't use anything! Ice punch, psychic, shadow ball, and, well, ANYTHING!" I yelled.

She climbed over the counter. "Are you sure?

"Completely! I told her to use those attacks, but she couldn't do anything!"

"I was a witness!" Ruby yelled.

She took Blossom from my arms. "I can do some tests on Blossom," she said. Blossom couldn't care less, now that she had woken up a bit.

(-)

I felt kind of bad for her because with all the suction cups on her, she looked pretty ungainly, as opposed to the normally mysterious and graceful gardevoir. She was pretty embarrassed, or maybe mad.

Professor Juniper frowned a bit.

"What? Are they okay?" I asked impatiently.

She turned to face us. "Well, it seems Gardevoir got hit with it the worst, so all of her attacks are disabled. However, since your other pokemon got hit with it too, their type attacks are disabled. For example, Minus and Plus can't use discharge."

"You don't mean Killer?" Ruby shouted.

"Or Sableye?" Nick yelled, equally as loud.

She nodded.

"Actually," my uncle started to suggest, "I think I should be able to help them all as best I can. However, it would take two days. Maybe more for Blossom."

"Gar de voirgard gardevoir!" She said, which probably meant, "Get these things off of me!" I giggled at my pokemon's vanity.

Alex and Brandon ran in. Well, Brandon didn't run; he walked. "Hey! You! Girl with the tube top!" Alex yelled as she pointed to me. "Come with me, PLEASE!"

Reluctantly, I followed her outside the lab to the still-cloudy terrain.

"Okay, I don't know if we've been properly introduced, but I'm Alex, and it's short for Alexandria, but that's so uptight and I hate it! Anyway, I was super excited about today, I couldn't fall asleep! I was up all night listening to techno music and dancing! You'd think I'd be really tired now, but I had twenty cappuccinos this morning! I usually have forty, but my mom took away the other twenty. She's so annoying! Brandon's been my friend since we were babies, so we decided to go on our journey together! Isn't that cool? Is that what it's like for you and Ni-"

Brandon had put a hand over her mouth. "Ignore her; she's completely insane. And this is only with her _half _dose of caffeine. You don't know how annoying that can be."

My mind flashed to a mental image of Ruby, going completely crazy with javas. "Oh, I think I can relate," I said.

He smiled, surprisingly. "I like you. You're…different."

"Different how?"

"Well, you're not falling head-over-heels for me yet."

"Great. So, do you guys want to come on our journey with us?" I asked.

He paused, still holding Alex. "Hm, I guess. Alex?"

He removed his hand from her mouth and released her. "Sounds…" she prepared. "Awesome!" She yelled, then did a cartwheel. Brandon groaned and hit himself on the forehead.

As if on cue, Nick and Ruby came running out. "Lila!" Ruby was yelling. I rolled my eyes. He kept running and ended up falling onto me, pushing us both to the ground. "What the hell is so important that you threw me on the ground for?" I screamed.

There are three things I don't like in this world: Being pushed, annoying fan girls, and having someone touch my shoulder from behind me. Truth be told, I _am_ a fan girl of anime, but not the annoying kind. Now that Ruby has done one of those things, I was pretty pissed.

He lifted himself from me, and I got up with the help of Nick. "Okay, guess what? Go on, guess!"

"You found fifty more coffees?" I asked sarcastically.

"Even better!" He put an arm around my shoulder. "Okay, so Killer freaked out and used ThunderShock on the machine attached to Blossom! She was so mad, she used Ice Punch! Then psychic!"

I was completely stunned. For a few seconds, I stood there. Then, I flung my cousin off of me and ran into the lab.

Blossom was happily sending Shadow Balls around the room. "Blossom!" I yelled as I ran over and hugged her.

Professor Juniper, looking more disheveled than before, stood up from behind a counter again. "Quick Lila, hook up your pokemon! Killer can use ThunderShock again!" I threw out everyone, and hooked them up with the suction cups.

"Killer, ThunderShock!" I commanded. It shot a beam of electricity into the machine, and Absol howled in pain. Meanwhile, Minus and Plus were having a blast. Eventually, the electricity resided, and it was quiet. I pulled the suction cups off of Minus and Plus, and grabbed them. Their cheeks were sparking with energy. "Minus, Plus, use discharge on me." They looked at each other as if confused, but shrugged it off pretty quickly. Their cheeks zapped energy onto my whole body, and I screamed with happiness. "Awesome! We can have battles again!" I put everyone back in their pokeballs, and ran back outside.

"So, are we ready to go?" I asked.

"I guess so!" Nick said with a smile.

With those last words, we waved goodbye to Nuvema Town, and onto new horizons!


	6. Trouble in Accumula Town!

The five of us walked onto route one. "I take it you guys know how to catch pokemon?" I asked Brandon and Alex.

"Yeah. We did it as kids." Brandon replied.

Alex nodded. "I remember throwing the tennis ball at Mom's purrloin. She was _so _mad!" She said remembering.

"The only thing I remember was you trying to snowboard down the stairs on my dad's stunkfish." Brandon said moodily.

"Oh yeah! Didn't you guys do anything crazy as kids?" She asked the three of us.

We all shared separate glances, and shook our heads.

"What, is it a code of secrecy?"

"Maybe." I responded. "Anyway, do you want to challenge gyms? Or focus on contests?" I asked them.

"'_Contests?_'" Brandon repeated, obviously confused.

"You don't know what contests are?" I asked, super surprised.

"No. What, do you compare pokemon?" Alex guessed.

"Oh my god, you would never survive Hoenn! Everyone there has competed in one!" Nick followed.

"Anyway, in a pokemon contest, you train your pokemon to use moves that show off beauty and grace in the appeal round. If you survive that, there're contest battles. It's like the appeal round, but it tests your battle knowledge to the extreme. The point of a contest battle is not to defeat your opponent (although it is recommended), but to use beauty and grace to make your opponent look as awful as a caterpie!" I explained.

"Sounds terrible," Alex said.

"Actually, they can get pretty intense. Like, when Lila battled it out with Top Coordinator Wallace for position as best coordinator. It was _amazing_!"

"Did you win?" Brandon asked.

"By one point." I said humbly.

"Cool."

Suddenly, we heard a small purring behind us. We all turned and faced a cute purple kitten! "What's that?" I thought out loud. I pulled out my pokedex, and scanned it. "Purrloin, the devious pokemon. It will fool trainers using a cute ruse, then steal objects from them." The dex read.

"That sounds like a dark type!" Nick yelled happily. "Go, Sableye! Use shadow claw!"

Sableye's claws grew twice as long as normal, and were surrounded with a dark aura. It ran up to Purrloin, and tried to scratch it. It didn't do much!

"Nick, do something psychic! Like psycho cut!" I suggested from the side.

"Yeah! You heard her, Sableye!" The diamond-eyed pokemon generated blades of psychic, glowing energy and flung them at the cat. It was a direct hit. "Go, pokeball!" He threw the small red and white capture devise at it. It was retracted in, and the ball shook thee times before we all heard a "Ding!". Nick ran over and picked up the pokeball. "Alright! I caught," He said with a slight spin. "A Purrloin!"

"Now that Nick is ecstatic, let's go into that town!" I said, pointing ahead.

(-)

So the five of us walked into Accumula Town, the pit stop for trainers. There was a small stage, and a large group of people standing outside for the small town. "Weird," Brandon muttered, face buried in a book. "It says here Accumula Town isn't this busy. Wonder what's going on…" He snapped the book shut.

I glanced up at the stage, and saw the worst looking man ever.

So, the dude was in his late forties, maybe early fifties, and he had green hair that was as long as Alex's. Then he had an eye patch/ monocle/ terminator thingy over his right eye. But the worst thing of all was his outfit. It was a _poncho_ (who wears those?) with color-swapped eyes on it. It also had a crown/ rib carcass on top with a "P" on it. The only thing I heard him say was that he needed to "liberate the pokemon".  
>These dorks in pseudo-futuristic outfits ushered Crazy Pants off the stage. "We must have come at the end," Ruby whispered, stating the obvious.<p>

"Oh, thank you, Ruby. It was like we didn't know," I followed up sarcastically.

He glared. "Shut up." We looked around to see the crowd separating, and slowly shuffling back to what they were doing before Crazy Pants started rambling. And soon enough, we were the only ones standing there.

It was pretty quiet, until someone put their hand on my shoulder; in which I screamed, turned around, and was about to slap the figure with all my might. Only, I stopped mid-air.

There, standing before me, was the most attractive boy I'd ever seen. He had a green ponytail, with long bangs that fell gently into his face. His black and white hat was shadowing his face, giving him an edge of mystery. He wore a black turtleneck with a baggy white shirt over top, deep khakis, black and green tennis shoes, and odd bits all over. He held his hands in front of his face as a guard, and his eyes were shut tightly. He was at least a head taller than me, and maybe around 17. He opened one eye carefully, and then lowered his hands.

It finally registered in my brain that I was still standing there, mouth slightly agape, hand floating in the air. I pushed my arms behind my back and flushed.

The mysterious teen smiled. "Sorry I scared you. I'm N."

"L-lila…" I mumbled awkwardly. For once, Ruby didn't rush over to him. Instead, he smirked and laughed a bit.

"Hey, Nick, looks like you got some competition!" He said jokingly. I flung my head to face him, and shot him the "I'm-going-to-kill-you-if-you-don't-shut-up-right-now" look while blushing furiously. He rolled his eyes, and I wanted to kick him in the shin.

"May I speak to your pokemon?" N asked.

"What?"

"Your partner pokemon. Can I know its feelings?"

"Uh, sure…?" I was a bit confused, because it's not everyday a sex god/ male model comes up to you and asks to have nice little chat with your pokemon. I threw out Blossom, and they locked eyes. They were both still while time ticked away. Finally, N broke his gaze with Blossom.

"Interesting…not what I was expecting. Shall we battle?" He asked me with a devious smile. I felt my knees turn to jelly and give way a bit. A battle should get me out of my love-struck phase.

"Okay."

(-)

I threw out Minus, and he threw out a purrloin.

"You get first move," I declared.

"Great. Purrloin, scratch!" He called. Purrloin lifted one paw, and its claws grew and sharpened. It took off running to Minus, and scratched her in the face. It darted back to its amazingly gorgeous master, almost like a shadow. Hey, I'd go back to N if he was my master pretty quickly, too.

Minus was pretty ticked off. "Alright Minus, use shock wave!" I yelled. Her cheeks zapped to life, and she shot two beams of electricity to the purple kitten.

"Dodge it with pursuit!"

Purrloin jumped up in time to avoid the lightning bolts. It took off again for Minus.

"Defensive maneuver! Thunder Slap!" The minun jumped in the air to avoid Purrloin, and sent a thunderbolt on herself. Minus did and spin in the air, and launched herself ears first towards the ground. Purrloin jumped up, using scratch again. The two powers met, and there was a huge flash of blinding light and blast of wind. I shielded my eyes, and struggled to stay put on the ground.

The light resided, and our two pokemon stood, extremely weak. It was quiet, until the small thump of a pokemon falling over rang in our ears. To my eyes, Minus still stood. "I…won…?" I thought out loud.

"_Very_ interesting…" N mumbled while taking Purrloin into its pokeball. He walked casually across the battlefield to me. He brushed a lock of my jet black hair out of my eyes and said, "I have to get stronger friends. I hope to see you again, Lila." With those last words and actions, he walked out of Accumula Town.

"Well, that was interesting," Brandon muttered.

"You really seemed to like him, Liles!" Ruby said, poking my shoulder and grinning.

"Shut up. And stop poking me!" I swatted his hand away.

"I wish I could date someone like that, but my mom would kill me!" Alex babbled.

"Let's just keep going, okay?" I said, and my cheeks got hot.

"Look, she's blushing. Fine, to please the Love-Struck Lila, we'll shut up," Ruby said, still grinning like an idiot. I punched him in the arm. "Ow ow ow ow ow ow….!"

I made one solemn vow in my mind: _Never let Ruby see you do anything. _


	7. Striaton City and 3 Creepy Waiters!

**Okay,****I****know****I****should****have****done****this****with****the****other****chapters,****but****I****DON****'****T****OWN****POKEMON.****IF****I****DID,****THINGS****WOULD****CHANGE**_**DRASTICALLY**_**.**

**Enjoy chapter 6! I'm actually really happy it got this far, the Striaton City scenes were the things that stayed true to the original "Lila's Crazy Journey."**

(-)

"We're finally here, in Striaton City! Wonder who the gym leaders are? Wonder what kind of pokemon there are? Come on Killer; let's go get us a badge!" Ruby yelled and sprinted down the hill separating us from the first city.

"Oh god, wait you idiot!" I yelled before he fell on a rock and went rolling down. But it was too late; that all happened as I called him an idiot. I face palmed at my cousin's stupidity.

"Should we go help him…?" Brandon asked.

"No, he's fine," I said, waving my hand dismissively.

"I'm fine; I think I just broke my arm!" He yelled weakly up.

"Ruby…words cannot describe how much I wish you were smarter," I yelled back and started walking down the hill followed by the rest of our group to help him. When I got there, he was holding his right arm. I sighed and helped him up. "Let's go get you a cast or something."

"No, no, you can just use fabric! Use your jacket!"

"I'll take it from your pants." I tore a quarter of his right pants leg and his belt and made a makeshift sling. "There, is that better?"

"Yeah, but now I look stupid 'cuz my pants are all torn up," he grumbled.

"Come on; let's go get a badge already. The faster we do that, the faster you get new pants and a real sling."

So the 5 of us started walking into the city.

"Where's the gym?" Alex asked

"Excuse me," someone said from behind me. I turned around, and saw a grass type trainer, no doubt.

He was around 15, with minty hair that was all floofed up in the front like a plant or something, dark green eyes with no whites (how is that scientifically possible?) , and he was wearing something that made him look like a butler or a waiter. "I heard that you were…" As he saw me, his face fell due to shock. Then his eyes sparkled like emeralds. "You're Lila! As in, Lila Birch who defeated top coordinator Wallace!"

He got down on one knee, and grasped my hand. "Black hair soft, elusive, and dark as the night itself; baby blue eyes that glisten like pools of crystal water untouched by anything and yet somehow have an edge of darkness; the smirk that etches across your elegant face as you crush your opponents and soar to the top…you are my dark, angelic beauty, Lila."

Ruby chuckled. "Wow. Who the hell knew Lila had fanboys? Besides Drew, of course. He had a _huge_ crush on you."

"Since when are you spilling my relationships to random people?" I asked.

The fanboy finally dropped my hand and stood up. "Sorry, I'm just a huge fan of yours. My brothers are, too. I am Cilan, pokemon connoisseur." He bowed, just furthering my butler suspicions.

"What's a pokemon connoisseur?" Nick asked.

"I use my knowledge and experience to judge the compatibility between a trainer and pokemon. I then help them form closer bonds." He pointed a finger up and winked. "And that's the job of a pokemon connoisseur!"

"Oh, that's cool. Um, do you know where the gym is?"

Cilan did the pointing/ wink combo again. I'll take you there! Follow me!"

(-)

He led us right to a massive building with stone pillars around the outside. "Here we are!" Cilan said.

I couldn't help but smile. It was my first Unova gym battle, after all! "Alright, let's head in."

"We're here to-"Ruby stopped mid-sentence. This wasn't a gym; it was a restaurant!

Everyone was looking at him like he was insane.

"What the…?" I mumbled. Something was off.

Right then, a red-head waiter guy wearing almost the same outfit as Cilan and a blue-haired smart ass came up to us. "Hi! Welcome!" Caffeine said happily.

_Wow,__he__'__s__worse__than__Ruby__…_ I thought. Ruby might've been hopped up on coffee all the time, but at least he wasn't super perky.

"Welcome, friends," Smart Ass said in a calm tone.

Cilan placed a hand on my shoulder, which scared the crap out of me. "Please, make yourself at home!" He said in the almost exact tone that Caffeine had used. Then he pushed me to a table with Nick and Ruby.

Caffeine rushed up to our table immediately. "Comfy?" He asked when the 3 of us were seated. I nodded, a little creeped out by the attention they were giving us.

Smart Ass came over with a menu in hand. "May I start you off with something to drink?"

"No, thanks-"

"Change your mind?" He interjected. "I highly recommend the Coke Zero."

I shook my head. "I'm fine, really!"

Caffeine started the winking thing. "Alright, well we have a reasonably priced lunch menu!"

"It's only the morning," I acknowledged. Wow, Unova's really crazy…

I was getting pretty pissed while Caffeine and Smart Ass continued to "suggest" things (Or also known as fight over me).

Finally, after about a full minute of this, something just cracked in my mind. I stood up and screamed at the top of my lungs "_**For**____**the**____**love**____**of**____**god,**____**SHUT**____**UP!**____**I**____**just**____**wanted**____**a**____**gym**____**battle!**__**"**_

My crazy outburst scared Nick to death, I could tell. I'm not usually one to yell, so he almost fell out of the chair from shock.

All the other girls in the restaurant jumped up in super excitement. "_"__Gym__battle__'__?_" They asked in unison.

I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms. "That's what I said, right? Screw this; I'm leaving. Come on guys," I said and started walking towards the door.

"Just a minute!"

I whipped back around "What?" I said in utter disbelief.

The three guys walked to what I had thought was a fire place. This was becoming much, much stranger…

"Guys?"

"Yeah?" They answered.

"I think something screwed up is going to happen."

(-)

**So what'd you think? Was it terrible? Oh well, if it was, just tell me and I'll work on it. **


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